Jathan Janove, Chief Learning Officer
Marshall Goldsmith Stakeholder Centered Coaching
Previously, I’ve written about the communication tool I call the Same Day Summary (SDS). You can read about it here and here. I’ve been teaching, coaching and using this tool for over 20 years and I’ve heard from clients on many occasions that it’s the best thing they ever learned from me.
In this column, I’m going to address what goes wrong when people attempt to use the SDS and it misfires. Here’s a checklist to help you avoid making common mistakes. As MGSCC CEO Brandon Mergard says, “Cognition alone won’t translate into sustained behavior change.”
1. The SDS is not truly a summary. Don’t overload it with things you discussed that aren’t strategically related to your objective, which is to convey only what you think truly matters going forward.
2. No surprises. Until you have developed a regular and known practice of using the SDS, you need to let others know it’s coming. Also, resist the tendency to add something new in the SDS that was not actually discussed. If you omitted something of importance, quickly follow-up real-time. You can then include it in the SDS.
3. Be matter-of-fact. The purpose of the SDS is alignment and an agreed path forward. It’s not to vent, blame or criticize. When you write the SDS, make sure you’re in your prefrontal cortex, not your amygdala, and make sure the SDS is written to keep the reader in their prefrontal cortex. The SDS you write is not about you. It’s about them. Your SDS isn’t meant to make you feel better – or make you feel worse. It’s meant to align and set the stage for a win-win relationship going forward.
4. Don’t dwell on the past. The SDS should be forward looking. A brief reference – a glance in the rearview mirror – is okay. Just don’t stay there. A proper SDS is front windshield-oriented. It helps create a solid foundation for the relationship. Convert feedback into feedforward as described here.
5. Sooner the better. Research shows that our memories are essentially sieves. After about two hours, people will start remembering things differently. Although I call it the Same Day Summary, I urge you to think of it as the Same Hour Summary. Write and send it at your earliest opportunity. Don’t worry, once you master the technique, you can write most SDS’s in minutes.
6. Keep track of your SDS’s. It’s a great tool for civil, respectful, mutual accountability. If the other person zigs when they were supposed to have zagged, your previous SDS will be of great value in your subsequent discussion. However, it won’t help you if you can’t find it. Organize your SDS’s so that when you need them, you’ll know where to retrieve them.
The SDS is simple but not easy, at least at first. It will take some effort, practice, and trial and error before you get it down. Believe me, it’s worth the investment. Once the SDS becomes part of your regular communication practices, you’ll greatly enjoy the ROI.
If the Same Day Summary interests you, and you’re wise enough to know that cognition alone won’t get the job done, you are welcome to attend our online Coach Dojo where we practice these techniques. You can attend for free. To learn dates of future Dojos, visit the MGSCC Events page.
Jathan Janove, MGSCC Chief Learning Officer, is the author, most recently, of “The HR Renaissance: From Legal Guard to Growth Partner.”
